Wednesday

My Closet is Severely Lacking

I felt important today.

Not that I don't feel important in some way every day. But this kind of important, the kind I felt today, is different and it's been a long time since I've felt this way.

It felt reeeeaaaallly good.

My job right now is demanding. And, of course, fulfilling. That goes without saying. I stay at home with my two children. And as they are playing around me and chattering away, writhing around underneath a blanket as I write this post and peeking out at me laughing with upside-down-face, I would not want to be anywhere else doing anything else. I'm lucky to be able to do this and I know that. A lot of people can't.

But I won't lie. Sometimes I miss the office.

Things like that office business carpet smell, the morning office chit-chat (Did you watch Idol last night?), deadlines, coffee runs, phone calls at my work phone, work e-mails, meetings, oh and the business attire (of which, as I have found out, I am severely lacking in after two years).

Today I had an interview. Kind of. It was with a person who's looking for a copyeditor for another company (that's a fancy way of saying a recruiter). I found the posting somewhere and on a whim, I sent my resume in, and this was eons ago and they called me back. And today I found myself in a real office building with real office people wearing real office clothes. Oh it's been so long. I almost didn't go.

The funny thing is, after he called me back, I found out it was an office job.

Hmm. Eh, not really interested. I want to work from home, but thanks anyway. Thanks for calling.

Calls me back the next day. Oh, they'll do telecommute? Now we're talking. Oh. 40 hours? Nah, thanks anyway.

Calls me back the next day. Oh, you really like my credentials? (Now I'm giddy.) You think they might be able to do part-time? Telecommuting? At the rate I'm asking? Hmmm. Now we're getting somewhere.

So now I decide I have to go. It's like -- meant to be! And I am in a mad panic now scrambling because I had already decided I wasn't going to waste anyone's time by going to an interview for a job I wasn't going to take anyway and I hadn't prepared at all.

So I have to get out of my workout clothes and have my mother-in-law watch the kids so I can meet with him this afternoon instead of going to the gym. And...I have to edit a copyeditor "test", send that in, feed the kids (for some reason they are complete maniacs today and I don't know why -- maybe it's because I'm doing something other than playing with them), and OH YES, find something to wear that is not jeans, capris, or workout clothes. This is a problem.

Now I am dashing madly around the house from my bedroom to Mini's room (which has a full length mirror), trying on clothes. Keep in mind now that I purged most of the smaller clothes I had from my closet because I couldn't stand the pressure of being that size again and low and behold, I am that size again (or at least close) and I only have huge clothes! So I dig out a "size huge" pair of long black pants because they go with everything and I dig up a shirt that is pretty plain but conservative (nope, I have no suit pants or jacket or anything remotely like this). And I throw on a pearl necklace because that always seems to make everything ok. I mean, look at Laura Bush. OK. You're right. I'm no Laura Bush.

Anyhoo, I discover the pants have a hem problem (half of it is coming down) but I tuck it in and hope no one notices. Yes I could fix it. But there's no time!

So I'm ready, and I feel like a mess inside but pray desperately to the business office Gods that it doesn't show on the outside. And that no one looks down at my pant bottom.

I pull into the parking lot of the real office building with real office people wearing real office clothes and even though I am wearing pseudo-office clothes, I feel important. Like someone thinks I still have some skills. It's the office equivalent to getting checked out by a guy after you have had kids and have that new "I-just-had-kids" body (you know, the one where everything has shifted oddly into odd places). I realize this all may sound trite and silly but would you believe that there are times when one can go an entire day without adult conversation whilst at home? It's true.

But when I got inside, I was comfortable. I have always been a good interviewer. I do a reallly good job of convincing people they should hire me even when I have none of the experience they are looking for. Only this time, I have experience. I forget this a lot and it's a nice thing to remember. So I'm feeling good about this. And even if I don't get a job out if it, (let's face it, I really wasn't looking anyway so no love lost -- plus, the best part was hearing that my resume and background were impressive and a girl could stand to hear those kinds of things once in a while. It makes her feel important.) at least I got to sharpen up my interview skills and talk about myself somewhere other than this blog.

So it was a good day. I left the interview to go back to my "other job" and played outside and ate icepops in my pseudo-business clothes.

Oh, that reminds me.

I have to go shopping.

5 comments:

  1. I just *loved* this. Good for you! I can't imagine even considering working if I didn't have to (yes, I shouldn't admit that publicly, but it's been a helluva day, and my dream job would be "mom" instead of my best day behind any desk working for someone else), *but* for the right pay and working from home? Yep. Then I could. And even though I have a job in an office? I'd have nothing decent to wear to an interview either. :)

    I can't wait to hear how this turns out for you!

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  2. i totally can relate! i want an interview! really, for anything at all. i still have the pant suits and portfolio of my work. someone, anyone...interview?
    good for you girl, i hope you knocked their socks off. id hire you...oh wait i did, where is my website copy?????
    -jenny from the block

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  3. Its become apparent you need some adult time

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  4. Thanks for the laughs today girlie..
    Oh man, I know. I give kudos to you everyday and to all the other moms who choose to stay at home and raise kids. That is not for me. I have to be with adults, I have to work, I need to have that convo over the watercooler each and every day. You could not pay me to stay at home! Let's face it, someone would die. No doubt.
    You realize you just crossed the line of SAHMS..it is difficult to have you foot in both worlds. Believe me, I tried it. I had to quit MOPS because I was a "poser"..I was a terrible mother because I did not stay home and relish the thought of playing dolls all day. I was selfish because I wanted to visiting with clients rather than being at the park. I even heard that I must "have" to work and what a shame that was. HA!
    I remember the desperation I had about needing to go back to work and feeling the pressure put on from fellow SAHM's that I was all wrong for feeling like that.
    But working at home, well, that would be a good balance I think. Whatever the situation, I think you should go shopping. If anything, you will be the hottest mom at the park :)

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  5. What a very big step you took! I think it's great, and really, I can't wait to hear the outcome.

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