Running a race is very much a metaphor for life and all of its milestones. The ones you plan on and especially the ones you don't.
You spend a lot of time working up to something. You get nervous before the big day. You face your fears, you hope you "studied" enough and that all the work and hours you've put in were enough, and finally, the big day comes. The day you've been training for. Whatever that is. And that's when you see what you're made of. And it almost always surprises you.
Because you do so much more than what you thought! Every time.
Every day of our lives, we're in training for something. Getting a promotion. Having a family. Getting married. Every day's experience contributes to whatever milestone lies ahead. And sometimes milestones in our lives happen whether we plan for them or not and they're not always the happy kinds of milestones.
Like finding out you have cancer. Like one of my dear friends, Rose, a former co-worker and former roomate.
We were producers and our company was closing our bureaus. Mine in Tampa, hers in Chicago. They gave us the option to move to the New York headquarters. We jumped at it and decided we'd get an apartment together and take on the big bad city like two Mary Tyler Moores, hats and all. We shared all of the ups and downs that came with moving to an unknown place and working together and sometimes competing, but we stayed friends. We both moved back to our hometowns and got married and started families.
In 2007, she found out she had a tumor. She was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. She battled the cancer in the way I knew she would, boldly and with reckless abandon. She went through chemotherapy. She went through radiation. She lost all of her hair. Her four-year-old noticed her new "haircut" and told her he liked it. She's a fighter and today she's cancer-free. She tells her story so much better than me, go meet my friend Rose and watch her story, she was on FOX News channel.
Why am I telling you this?
Because I am running for her this June in San Diego at the Rock and Roll Half-Marathon that benefits the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. I am running with my favorite virtual sisters in the world, The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans as part of the Team In Training program. And I am running for Rose and for all who battle cancer.
The fun part is that right here, I vow to do some crazy to raise some money. Because I have to raise almost $3,000 and I am at the very very beginning and time is ticking. I'm starting to panic!
Won't you consider going over to my page right here and donating? In the next two weeks, I will let YOU vote for what CRAZY I will do IF AND WHEN I reach my fundraising goal! Yes! You decide! You decide just how silly I will be. And there is not much that I won't do in the name of fundraising for causes I believe in! (Just so you know!)
Some of you have already made suggestions that will go on the list. They are:
-dye my hair purple for the race
-get a (temporary) tattoo. Some of the girls on the team have talked about getting actual tattoos. I think I know how my husband feels about this one, but I love me tattoos (I have two.)
-get a mohawk. Unfortunately, I won't cut my hair to do this, but I might be willing to make a faux-hawk out of the existing hairs.
-eat mushrooms. *gag* I hate mushrooms with everything inside me. But someone my mother in law suggested this one, I really thought she liked me! and so here it is on the list.
I will blog and vlog and tweet about what I do so you will see it all for yourselves if you care to.
In the meantime, suggest away here in the comments below! And please help me reach my fundraising goal! Again, my fundraising page is here! I will open up voting 2 weeks from today!
Love and hugs!
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Tuesday
Mile by Mile, Step by Step; Some Crazy for Some Good
Friday
Tri-Eve and a pending Vlog
All week I was excited but today my hands are numb and what do you know, I'm actually nervous.
(HANG ON, I'M GOING TO GO OUTSIDE AND SCREAM REAL QUICK!)
(ok. it's out. all better.)
Tomorrow's tri day. The last one of the season. And I'm a party of one.
The husband and kids can't go. There's soccer.
Thankfully, I will be riding with a girl from my tri-group so I won't truly be rolling up on my own and competing on my own and packing up and going home on my own. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but when you have all sorts of people cheering other people on it can feel a little lonely to not have someone there cheering you on. But I will have myself! And that does count for something.
In the last one I did, the swim was canceled and I am hopeful that tomorrow the swim will stay on despite my reading that it's stingray mating season and there are a record number of stings this year and note to self about being careful about reading certain message boards before future triathlons.
And I practiced vlogging yesterday (yes, I actually practiced!) so that I can post a vlog today, my very first one! In my practice I have come to find that a certain gray shirt I was wearing yesterday was not flattering for the camera and that I have a good and a marginal side of my face.
All very pertinent research.
Also, I've learned that I look more like a robot when I'm on camera acting like "all business" than when I am acting like myself and somewhat animated. So I will try not to be all business and try to be myself but when that "record" button is pushed, it's like something happens and my animation turns off. I'll try to ignore.
So after I pick out something a little more flattering and make sure I'm looking at the camera on my good side, I'll record and post.
Meantime, I was over at the Sisterhood this week talking about redefining yourself, so please head over and check it out. See you later! Or rather, you'll see me later!
Monday
Mantra Monday: Open Water Jellies, Er, the "Just Shut up and Do It" Version
What a beautiful morning for a swim.That's along the causeway, where I've been complaining about, because underneath that calm, serene, gorgeous water that looks like glass, there is mud and muck and seagrass and sealife abound.
And I'm a big ol' wimp.
I was rockin out to some Linkin Park in the car coming over the causeway at 7ish in the morning, gettin all pumped up, and when I got out of the car to go swim, I took this mental picture with me.
Chrissie Wellington, who broke the women's Ironman World Championship record on Saturday in Kona, Hawaii (which kept me glued to my computer and my Twitter for a mere 10 hours).And she didn't get there by whining about sea grass, that's for sure.
Sure, she swam 2.4 miles, biked 112, and then finished that all off with a marathon. And it's not like I'm doing that any time soon.
Therefore, in comparison, swimming a lame 1/2 mile in some muck made me feel pretty much kind of schmucky for complaining. My inspiration cup seriously overfloweth this weekend.
So I've decided to take the following approach: Just shut up and do it.
Since I'm such a head case, the more I talk in my head (even when I'm trying to talk myself out of something) the more likely I am to completelyutterlyobsess over it. The polar opposite of what it is I'm trying to do. So I tried this other tactic, the justshutupanddoit tactic, along with some helpful reading I have found online, and I, well, just shut up and did it.
And what do you know, it worked. It freakin' worked.
So because it is actually pretty common to fear the unknown lurking below you when you're swimming, there was no shortage of articles and tips on how to NOT freak the hell out, so I figured it couldn't help me to try some.
-Like, for instance, focusing on internal factors, like breathing and stroke, rather than external factors, like
This helped very much, actually. I focused on my breathing and my stroke, and I kicked a little more wildly than I otherwise would have in an effort to scare off any outsiders. I had a little bit of inner panic going along the way and had to stop, but not like last time. I actually kept going (we swim along the shore to the big bush on the side and then back to where the cars are parked) and I got me through the first leg of the swim. Of which at the end, on my last two strokes or so, I look ahead of me and Wahh! A big ol' jellyfish right in my face, waving hello, right there. I could reach out and touch it. But of course I didn't. That would be crazy. I flailed about a little in a quiet panic and moved out of its way and then we waited for everyone to catch up before we started again (yes! I wasn't last!!) I was sure that by now, the floater had gotten far enough away (I was pretty sure since it was traveling at zero miles an hour, it actually probably was somewhere near me again but since I was in "just shut up and do it mode"I pretended it swam off to greener pastures.)
And then we swam back. On the swim back, I followed behind someone because I figured two people thrashing around together was better than one! And plus, I completely focused on her yellow swimcap. I let the swimcap guide me. Only two people were stung by something on this swim. The funny thing is, no one in my group cares or makes a big deal about anything. It's like eh, whatever. I got stung. So pretty much, if I do the math, something will get me one day. It's a mathematic certainty. But so what. I won't die. So whatever. (Right?)
-Another thing I did. Surround yourself with "the bad guy". I did this by accident. Some people fear the splashing and thrashing about of other swimmers because it makes them skip a breath and go into panic because they can't catch their breath. In this case, it helps if someone goes with you and splashes you in the face while you're swimming so you can get used to it. You let someone be the bad guy. I am actually fine with the thrashing about (it means no sea life will come and get me), but I do fear the floaties in the water, anything that touches me, really, and when it does (mostly grass) I skip a breath and start to panic. Fortunately for me, I got to swim directly through big patches of weeds that were floating in the water in bunches. And the more I did it, the more "at one" I became with things touching me. Amazing stuff.
Moral of the story? Whatever you're afraid of, completely immerse yourself in it.
So how much is it costing me $35 to tackle my fear of swimming
A mere 35 bucks. That's the cost of my trigroup membership.
Totally worth it.
Here's a little more of the shore. It's not a beach, it's along a causeway and people stand in the water and fish or they kayak here.
If you look really closely, there is some sort of fish or something going back below the surface. Yes, there's sea life in there, it's the sea. So just shut up and swim. Sorry. Talking to myself again.
After the swim, we biked and I realized why they like to swim here.
Because the bike is freakin fanastic.
It's on somewhat normally busy roads but traffic is light on Sunday morning, and there is a luxurious bike lane and the scenery is gorgeous! I complain about living in Florida (the heat, my God the heat!) but today was a day that I basked in it. It.was.GORGEOUS. Period.
After the run and bike, I was on top of the world.
Saturday
Rogue Treadmill
The treadmill tried to kill me.
This is the first time I've ever been attacked by a piece of gym equipment, so I'm not sure how to handle it.
I'm not going to call the police or file a restraint, but I want to state for the record that the treadmill has, indeed, tried to off me, and I am filing that away in my mind for the future.
Do I think it was on purpose? Perhaps.
Here's how it went down.
It was just like any other Thursday night. After dinner, I went to spin class, which was 45 minutes long. Instead of stretching at the end, I cleaned up my bike, put on my headphones, ate a Power Bar gel pack, and hopped on the treadmill.
It was a "brick" workout, which means doing two exercises in the triathlon back to back and in a similar fashion that you would if you were racing (aka gel pack to restore energy and all).
So I chose my treadmill. I put it to 5.5 which is my normal pace, just under an 11 minute mile. Yes I am still slow. No judging, please.
But when I looked down, the treadmill said 5.0.
Hmmm.
That doesn't look right.
So I pressed the arrow up once and for one second, it said, 5.6, then immediately after, read 5.1.
And so I pressed the "up arrow" once again to 5.7, and it said 5.7 for a second before it went back down to 5.2.
Hmmm.
All the while, I'm running and I literally feel like I am going.to.die.
I cannot breathe.
I'm huffing and puffing.
My heart is pounding.
And I am quite sure that by now this is not even a 5.7. It must be 6 or more. It cannot possibly be 5.5, 5.6, or 5.7. Because the treadmill is going so fast I feel like any moment it is going to fling me off the back and into the row of steppers behind me.
And so I frantically press the DOWN ARROWS.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Trying to slow.this.thing.down.
And finally it stops. And my heart is pounding and my face is all red and by the way, remember I just did a 45 minute spin class that has kicked my ass... I am really only trying to do an easy run here!
So I move over to the treadmill next to me and start over.
5.5.
And it feels like I am on a leisurely stroll. Compared to the superfast ridicu-tread that just happened.
And as I'm running, I look over and see a blinking message. "Speed Error."
Oh really? Gee. Thanks.
Information that would've been useful 5 MINUTES AGO!
After I got home, my butt muscles hurt so bad, I needed a butt massage. I wish I were kidding. The pain, oh the pain! It felt like there were little knots in my gluteal maximusses. Which I am trying to make minimusses thankyouverymuch. That's the point of the treadmill and other gym equipments. It hurt just to sit down.
So, Treadmill. What's the deal? Do you have a beef with me? You didn't think you could talk to me about it, you just had to take action? Oh sure, you did some damage.
But I want you to know, Treadmill, that your efforts to kill me were futile. I know who you are and what you tried to do. And when the lights are off and the gym is all dark and you think everyone has gone, you'd better sleep with one eye open.
Because it's on.
That's all I'm sayin'.
Thursday
The Fly
After taking a few days off from working out last week, then getting sick until oh, yesterday, I got back on the wagon with my first official triathlon-training workout. Which was, swimming.
Yep.
Yesterday was alllllll about realizations.
So I stuffed myself into the black and blue number I purchased last week, and then I stuffed my gargantuan melon into the tight black swimcap I also purchased, along with the mirror-reflecting goggles I got and realized who I looked like when all was said and done.
The Fly.
Actually, the Fly with Fatback. Because in the back of my swimsuit there is a large hole that all of my backfat spills out of. I love functional swimsuits. I love functional swimsuits. (Are we sure they don't make any with skirts?)
But I owned it. I sure did. I swam my workout which did not take me long at all, mind you, and then, I realized about halfway through, that swimming really is quite hard work! I've always heard this but I've never quite believed it! Because I don't remember there ever being a time during any swimming I've done previously where I've gotten completely out of breath. But there I was completely out of breath and panting and when I was finished, my arms were like spagetti. And then I realized that sure, I can swim. But only barely. I know how to, basically, not drown. I am going to need some practice here.
I suppose I've never really done any lap swimming, come to think of it, except for in high school in my best friend's pool. And who knows if we were doing that right.
But I do love swimming. It feels like I'm playing in a pool and not really doing any kind of exercise or workout. Until I'm halfway done, that is, and realize I can't breathe. I still don't particularly like the backfat and the thighdimples that have to make an appearance on the way to the pool, but that's what this is all about anyway, so who really cares.
Oh I so wanted to take a picture of me as "The Fly" just to show you the sheer ridiculousness of my new look, but I just couldn't humiliate myself that way. Not even for a great Wordless Wednesday post. (And it would be great.) But we'll let the words rather than the picture tell the story here (for now) because honestly, on T-Day, plenty of people will see me as "The Fly", only scarier, The Fly that is running. When I am dressed up in all my "Fly" garb and running into the ocean with the gaggle of other swimcapandgogglewearers. A swarm, if you will.
Anyway, workout one, complete. 4 months to go! And I'm excited. But of course I still need a bike. I'm doing this a bit backwards, I know, but you gotta start somewhere. It's like the inverted pyramid in news. You write the most important stuff (the lead) then you back it up with all the other less-important facts. Here, I sign up for crazy events, then figure out how on earth I will do them. Or in this case, how I will properly equip myself to do them. Until then, I'll be doing some spinning.
ps. Dont forget to click the contest info link at the top! Last Quest for Greatness weigh-in TOMORROW!
Sunday
7 Miles
Woohoo!!!!
This morning was our long run and it was 7 miles, officially the longest distance I have ever run. And I didn't want to die afterward! It wasn't that bad! Except for the leg muscles shaking at the end and having to do about 10 minutes of stretching...
What I am learning from this training process is the following (besides wishing I could carry a pen and paper because I always have the greatest inspiration to write while I'm on runs):
I am learning that at the other side of uncomfortable, there is comfortable.
You wouldn't think so when you've just gone up a huge hill and can barely catch your breath on the way down, knowing you still have 4 1/2 miles left and you're panting, but it's true.
There was a time where I was so uncomfortable that I really really wanted to stop. I was officially out of my comfort zone. But just a little later, things got better and my legs went on autopilot and that got me through two more miles. Then things got rough again, but for the final mile, half of which was a sprint because you could see the "finish line", it got better again.
It was a rollercoaster run, but for every period of uncomfortable, there was comfortable and there's something to be said for pushing through the uncomfortable part. I just have to remember that as I continue the long runs, because next week is 8 miles, followed by 9, followed by 10 and these are the final weeks of training. For next week I think if we did 7, then surely we can do just one more, right? Getting into the unknown now and getting a little nervous...
